I can tell my little world is spinning toward a change, but my brain is moving slower than the rest of me and hasn't quite caught up. For the past month, I've slept in, went to late lunches, shopped, visited family and friends in Kansas City, and floated about as I pleased. I've enjoyed my condensed - and last ever - little summer. I think it's been good for Josh and I as well because we've had so much free time together.
I can't help but wonder a little if I've forgotten how to work. Or what is life like when I have somewhere to be? I still don't have my internship for next year, but I do have someone who wants to work with me and is trying to squeeze me in somewhere in his practice. I am learning to trust God again because I really can't control how this turns out. It's interesting to see him do what it seems he loves to do - wait until the last minute. Now I know that God is not a procrastinator like I usually am. But it is interesting how he waits until the deadline to bring something I need, like money or a job or whatever. It's like the whole time he's asking, "Do you trust me?" And I'm saying, "Yes, but can you please hurry." Is that really trust?
This time I am not so stressed. I have seen God bring the needed thing at the seemingly last possible second enough times to know it will come. I know it will come. Not because I am doing anything right, but because he loves me. My job is simply to get better at trusting - it makes it easier on both of us. I'll be offering an update on this as soon as God comes through again. It will be a good story too, I'm sure, as it always is.
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