After leaving an environment where anything is possible, it's hard to come back to Manhattan. Anything is possible in Manhattan too because it's still the same God, but it doesn't feel that way. In some ways, it was like Lakeland was this mini ecosystem where the rules of sickness and death did not apply. Outside the tent, the world was dark and scary and pain was free to wreak its havoc. But inside the tent it was different. As I write, I realize that I am simply describing, in another way, the kingdom of heaven. Where the kingdom of heaven reigns, the world's rules don't apply anymore. The kingdom of heaven rules in that tent. The question is: why? What brings the kingdom of heaven to rule in a place?
Several people have asked me what I am taking home with me after Lakeland. I don't feel different to be honest. I saw things I've never seen before, but in some ways, it was so surreal, it was hard to comprehend. I know for a fact people were being healed before my eyes, but I have no paradigm for this sort of lifestyle. I want to believe this is possible here, in my world - Lord, help my unbelief - but the challenge is that everything and everyone in Manhattan looks the same as when I left. On Saturday night, Todd Bentley challenged the crowd with Psalm 78. The Psalm reminded the Israelites what happened when they forgot the great works of the Lord. They forgot how God led them victoriously out of Egypt, parted the Red Sea and the Jordan River, conquered their enemies, brought food literally out of the sky, and kept their clothes in tact for 40 years while they wandered the desert. I've had miracles of all sorts in my own life, and I praised God for them and loved living in that kind of faith. But after a while, when paychecks are regular and life speeds up, I forgot. Just like the Israelites, I forgot.
I'm not sure how to do it yet, but the cure seems to be regularly practicing remembrance. I should probably have a list of things God does for me, big ones, small ones, things I see him do for other people. I'm not sure how to incorporate this into my every day life with God, but maybe it would just be taking a minute or two to run through a Thank You list. I'm not going to announce what I will do or how it will go, but I want to be a grateful version of myself, a girl who remembers how big and how great her Father is. That's my goal. And I plan to get there by thanking God for just some of what he does every day. I can start now, I suppose.
God, thank you for healing that boy of his deafness. Thank you for healing the girl of the tremors she was born with. Thank you for reversing the MS and the paralysis in that woman on Saturday. Thank you for healing me and my dad of our migraines on Saturday. Thank you for healing Leland of his carpal tunnel syndrome last week. Thank you for healing Dawn of Cystic Fibrosis in June. Thank you for healing that guy I prayed for of his back pain on Thursday night. Thank you for letting me hear your voice and share the encouragement with Daniel on Friday night. Thank you for bringing an even deeper level of emotional freedom for me over the whole weekend. Thank you for providing employment and finances for Josh and I. We never go without. Dad, you are a merciful Father and a generous God. Let your people remember and never forget your goodness and graciousness to us. And may your kingdom come to Manhattan, KS.
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